Fishwrap has not died but it has been ailing because of ailments
Bacteria, virus, who the heck knows put our director and irreplaceable chief editor on their backs.
The quacks had little to say that even sounded helpful: Get rest and plenty of sleep and you should be fine.
Thanks Doc.
In truth, the remarkable spirit of our editor looks like he will win.
But also
This is not exactly the miracle life-saver but it's sure close.
You could make a movie out of this. Or at least a documentary.
 The Secrets of the East Asian Sisterhood
Secret Number 1: The all-time cure for all ailments and sicknesses and disease:
 Congee aka Rice Porridge aka Joke, etc etc
Cures Everything and Everyone! Including editors.
Airlines halt 50-year agreement to allow all U.S.-Asia passengers 2 Free suitcases
The allowance of two free suitcases per passenger came into effect in the early 1970s. And ended it, quick as a finger snap.
The proof is in the ticket of a vital and Adored Fishwrap political expert-reporter who has just been awarded a three-month trip, all expenses paid, to look at the U.S. political process, and good for her, eh?
She just got the confirmed return ticket document, with this part highlighted.
This is a copy, directly from her AA ticket.
American Airlines does not fly to Thailand so it gives the business to Japan Airlines.
At least it's clear that the best Canadian hockey team is (again) Edmonton Oilers.
El Lay out-shot Edmonton 33-13 and lost their Game 4 by 1-0.
Also: Yes, any other questions? Are the Oilers still Canada's best shot at the Cup?
The Rangers' sweep dreams came true as they swept aside the Capitals and Ovi Ovechkin -- his last Cup chance.
 Rangers next face Hurricanes or Islanders.
You've got to feel for Ovi. https://t.ly/Ss_Ar
OVERSEAS EDUCATION
Canada has just decreed that overseas university students have to stop working after 24 hours in each week -- not 40, like before.
Toronto Star https://t.ly/r74MH
TECHNOLOGY
Specifically AMERICAN technology. (We'll get to you, Canada, in just a bit. Hold yer horses, eh?)
American Airlines still hasn't properly fixed its Y2K problems. (BBC)
A 101-year-old frequent flier keeps being assigned a baby seat.
https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c9wz7pvvjypo
MongoDB CEO Dev Ittycheria talks AI hype and database evolution. (Tech Crunch)
To clarify: He says that AI is mostly hype. Sure, anyone want to argue?
https://techcrunch.com/2024/04/28/mongodb-ceo-dev-ittycheria-interview-ai-hype-database-evolution/
He is, two words, refreshingly sensible:
My life has not been transformed by AI," he said. "Yes, maybe I can write an email better through all those assistants, but it's not fundamentally transformed my life. Whereas the internet has completely transformed my life.
The BS du mois
Huawei's Pura 70 contains SMIC 7nm technology, and also unicorn farts. (The Register)
 Nope! SMIC doesn't have 7nm technology. It has 14nm with multi-patterning.
https://www.theregister.com/2024/04/29/teardown_confirms_huaweis_pura_70/
What happens to TikTok? (The Verge)
The author of this article is either delusional or drunk, but in any case, the answer is it dies and is forgotten within a week.
https://archive.is/zCg4v
Ontario reveals details of cellphone ban in schools. Here are the new rules for students. Ontario is the most populous province in all of Canada.
On Sunday, the province announced new measures for schools, which also included a crackdown on student vaping.
Effective for the new school year starting in September
 No cellphones in elementary schools for the entire day, and during class time for middle and high school students.
 All schools have to shut all access to social media sites.
 The province's minister of education Stephen Lecce is already bragging that he's bringing in 'the toughest policy in the (formerly polite) Canada.'
https://www.thestar.com/politics/provincial/ontario-reveals-details-of-cellphone-ban-in-schools-here-are-the-new-rules-for-students/article_7b111e08-0561-11ef-862c-e33b0ff9dbce.html
FISHWRAP ANALYSIS
All of the above will not last one week, because it cannot. Steve is totally out of touch. Get him out of there.
IBM investing $730M to grow Canadiansemiconductor manufacturing plant (EJ)
Focused on advanced semiconductor components at IBM's 800-acre site near Edmonton.
https://edmontonjournal.com/news/canada/ibm-investing-730m-to-grow-canadian-semiconductor-manufacturing-plant
Harvey Weinstein is not a rapist! Who knew, eh?
The New York Appeals Court ruled by 4-to-3 that the judge in the momentous #MeToo-Believe-Every-Woman case was prejudiced against the movie/TV mogul. The Court ordered a brand new trial.
https://variety.com/2024/film/news/harvey-weinstein-rape-conviction-overturned-new-york-1235981890/
But wait! Yeah, he is a rapist and is separately serving 16 years in a case where he raped an attractive Italian model.
https://nypost.com/2024/04/25/us-news/harvey-weinsteins-felony-sex-crime-charges-overturned-by-nys-highest-court/
We Wish That This Were Funnier.
https://twitter.com/TheBabylonBee/status/1783209461835862263
.